SDA Kinship News
A Wedding and a Vacation
BY JERRY MCKAY
On August 10, 1982, barely a week after my first weekend visit with Colin Cook, my sister and I loaded up a rented Capri station wagon and set out for Alberta where I would be a member of the wedding of a college friend. The difference between this trip and others Marilyn and I had taken together before was that she now knew about my orientation. I told her the night I returned from my first visit with Colin. Her knowing about my orientation was significant, but it didn’t mean much. Without access to my experience, how could she know what I was going through? Often during this trip, I was lost in self-reflection about my past, present, and future, all through the lens of reparative therapy.
In two weeks, we will gather near Portland, Oregon, for SDA Kinship’s 40th annual Kampmeeting! It is absolutely fantastic that Kinship has survived and grown into this amazing community of members from all around the world! And it started with just a few folks who wanted to connect with other gay and lesbian members from a Seventh-day Adventist background. Today we are many folks connecting with other LGBTIQ folks who are current or former Seventh-day Adventists or allies.
My very first Kampmeeting that I attended in 1995 was in Oregon. I remember vividly flying over all those beautiful evergreens as the plane approached Portland’s airport, feeling both excited and nervous to be flying somewhere I’d never been before and didn’t know a soul. John Wieland and Sherri Babcock picked me up from the airport. They were great people to send to help make a new member feel comfortable.
by Ellen Henderson
Every spring, something very special happens on the Eastern Seaboard. Members of Region 2 (and friends) gather at a small beach house in Rehoboth, Delaware, for some much-needed time of relaxation and fellowship.
Colombia is a country located on the corner of South America, bathed by two oceans and crossed by a beautiful mountain range, full of valleys and deserts. This diversity can also be observed in our Kinship family that has flourished in three cities: Bogota, Medellin, and Cartagena. This year we will be starting the groups of Barranquilla and Bucaramanga, cities with a high Adventist presence in our country.
Kinship today has grown in fronts such as spirituality, healthy recreation, and healthy lifestyles, as well as support in the work of our members, all supported by some fronts of the Colombian state, which has provided spaces and resources for it.
I imagine many of you watched the Oscars the other night. Some viewers were interested in what the stars wore while others hoped that their favorite movie won Best Picture or their favorite artist won Best Actor. There are so many categories at these award shows that there’s something for everyone to root for.
By Ellen Henderson
Do you remember those yearly reports you had to do in school? “Write about what you did this summer.” Well, here’s mine: I got to spend time with my family this summer.
Colombia is a South American country with a diversity of regions and beautiful landscapes. This diversity is also observed in its people, both in ethnic and sexual diversity.
Three years ago, we formed the Kinship group which was organized with a small group in Bogotá; today we already have two more groups in the city of Medellin and Cartagena, with a total of almost 50 members distributed throughout the territory.
Life is unfolding like a dream for graduate student, Marc LaChance. In his final year at university, student housing pairs him with Howard Hildebrandt. Howard is built like a linebacker, Marc’s dream of what a real man should look like. He discovers that Howard shares his minority affectional orientation, and the two men become lovers.
Looking forward to graduation, they plan to escape Winnipeg’s cold, prairie winters by moving to Vancouver, British Columbia. They imagine their life on the Pacific coast: a house with an ocean view, winter weekends skiing Grouse Mountain, and summers sailing the Salish Sea.
At spring reading break, they make an exploratory trip to Vancouver. Marc obtains an interview with a suburban school district and is promised a teaching position in September. If Howard can land an engineering job on the coast, their dream will be realized.
Marc’s happiness is shattered when Howard tramples their dream into the prairie dust by accepting an engineering position in Winnipeg. His conservative religious upbringing tells him that men who love men will burn in hellfire forever. The guilt over his relationship with Marc is making him sick. He has no choice but to break it off.
DISCLAIMER: The material in this chapter deals with sensitive issues with respect to the author's experience when he was in counseling with Mr. Cook. Some may find this section upsetting. At the same time, the author would like to stress that these events were in 1982 and that a lot of time has passed since then. The author has a long history with Mr. Cook. Over the last couple of years, he has been in contact with Mr. Cook about these incidents. This, however, is for a later chapter.
On Tuesday, February 26, 2019, the United Methodist Church (UMC) voted in a special session of the General Conference (their top legislative body) to adopt the “Traditional Plan” which sought to strengthen enforcement of the denomination’s homosexuality prohibitions. It was passed by a vote of 438-384.
This special session of the UMC, the second largest protestant denomination in the United States, was the resut of a 2018 report of a commission established by the Council of Bishops (COB) to review their Book of Discipline, a fundamental book that outlines the denomination's law, doctrine, and procedures.
SDA Kinship members interact with each other online via Facebook and WhatsApp. If you aren't already connected with one or more of the groups (main, men, women, youth, seniors, etc, etc), please send a note to info@sdakinship.org or send Floyd Poenitz a private Messenger note and ask to be added to these groups. If you use WhatsApp, let us know so you can participate there too.
If you speak Spanish or Portuguese, be sure to ask us to add you to the Kinship en Espanol or Kinship Brasil groups!
Here in Maryland, January is leaving us with the coldest temperatures in a very long time. I feel for our members in the Midwest! I hope everyone in the Northern Hemisphere stays warm and safe. For those in the Southern Hemisphere, enjoy the beautiful weather. We will feel warmer thinking of you.
What I really love about SDA Kinship is that it’s always been a safe space for members to be who we are, regardless of where each of us is on our journey. Some members are in long-term relationships and some are married. Others feel that celibacy is right for them, and still others are dating. All of us want to be on a path that works best for our lives.
Between 3,000 and 4,000 members of the LGBTIQ community participated in the annual Creating Change Conference in Detroit, January 23-27. I was glad to be a part of the Spiritual Care Team and meet hundreds of participants in the Many Paths spiritual space including a number of Seventh-day Adventists who were attending the conference. Along with a number of plenary sessions, there were hundreds of workshops available, making it a challenge to figure out which ones to attend.
I had the privilege of being the guest lecturer for a class on Religion and Gender at La Sierra University. I shared the story of my journey and had a conversation with the students regarding their questions about our community.
Happiest of Holidays!
As 2018 comes to a close and we get ready for a brand new start in 2019, I want to express my gratitude to all who have made Kinship’s progress possible this year. Many of us contribute to our progress by generously giving the best of ourselves through our time, talents and funds. I like to quote this snippet from Generous Life, Increasing Your Joy Through Giving by the Fetzer Institute.
Jamaica: Adventist pastor apologizes after favorably citing song lyrics that call for the shooting death of LGBT people:
By the 2018/19 Transgender Seminarian Cohort: Davíd E. Patiño and Ezra Fairley-Collins, Jude Johnson, Greyson Kentopp, Erica Saunders, Cole Williams
As trans people, we know the love of God. We feel it in our bones, in the very skin that lines our bodies, in the very nature of who we are. God is that voice within us that shows us the way to authenticity, to self-love, and to community. The Holy Spirit is at work within and through us. The Holy Spirit is that which can transform our deepest anger, sadness, and loneliness into something new. We can recognize this when the impossible happens, when inside us, despite our despair, there is the tiniest of lights, the smallest sign of hope, the little bit of energy that seems to be coming from within us. The Holy Spirit is that which resurrects us from the death we experience deep inside us from trauma. It is the darkness that shelters us and keeps us safe. The Holy Spirit resurrects us and allows us to see our own sacred divinity.
How We Fit In is a podcast project dedicated to sharing the stories of current and former Seventh-day Adventist church members all around the world. We want to explore how over 25 million unique individuals fit under one belief system. We all have stories to tell, and they deserve to be heard.
Reinder Bruinsma has been a Seventh-day Adventist conference president for the Netherlands and for Belgium, General Conference administrator, pastor, and author - among several other things. In what he loosely calls his "retirement" he continues to write, speak to Adventist leadership and laity conferences and, attend other meetings around the world.
Seventh-day Adventist Kinship International (SDA Kinship) is joining a chorus of LGBTIQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex, queer/questioning) advocacy groups in calling on the Maritime Conference of Seventh-day Adventists to rescind its invitation to Coming Out Ministries, one of the featured presenters at a youth event in Pugwash, N.S., this July.
Here’s Why
While Coming Out Ministries (COM) has been promoted as being representative of LGBTIQ people, oddly, the leaders of this ” ministry” do not identify as LGBTIQ. Instead, they use terms such as “redeemed” to describe their sexual orientation. Their philosophy is predicated entirely on a model that views LGBTIQ people as fundamentally flawed and broken.
Your privacy and preferences are important to us at SDA Kinship, and we are providing this notice explaining our online information practices and the choices you can make about the way your information is collected and used.
We have recently updated our Privacy Policy so that you have a better understanding of what we do with your data.
On the weekend of April 20, the Seventh-day Adventist Church’s North American Division (NAD) hosted a workshop that included a select group of church leaders and lay members. The purpose of the workshop was to “participate and preview a new resource (booklet) titled Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones: Adventist Edition.”
LONG BEACH PRIDE IS ONE OF THE LARGEST PRIDE EVENTS IN THE COUNTRY.
We know that there are many people with a Seventh-day Adventist (SDA) connection who are part of the LGBT+ community, are LGBT+ affirming, and support equality on all facets of life.
Our goal is to be very visible to our Adventist communities. We want to demonstrate to all that the Adventist community is diverse and that we support each other regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity.
We are hopeful this will be the largest public demonstration of love, acceptance, and affirmation of all LGBT+ people with an Adventist connection. We encourage all attendees to wear or display Pride symbols/flags and clothing that proudly links you to an Adventist community like an Adventist university, church, or linked organization like disaster relief groups, veggie foods—whatever screams.
This Year, We’d Like to Do This
1
East-Central Africa Division (Kenya and Uganda, specifically) are open to receiving education on HIV/AIDS and learning about what it means to be an LGBTQ Adventist. Funds are needed to organize these meetings with the local pastors and Seventh-day Adventist conference officials to provide these resources.
East-Central Africa Division (Kenya and Uganda, specifically) are open to receiving education on HIV/AIDS and learning about what it means to be an LGBTQ Adventist. Funds are needed to organize these meetings with the local pastors and Seventh-day Adventist conference officials to provide these resources.
2
An easily accessible online self-study program designed for pastors, teachers, and church leaders to help them understand what it means to be LGBTQ and to create a safe environment for those who identify as such. This program would contain several modules, including stories, videos, presentations, etc. to cover the various aspects of being an LGBTQIA Adventist.
An easily accessible online self-study program designed for pastors, teachers, and church leaders to help them understand what it means to be LGBTQ and to create a safe environment for those who identify as such. This program would contain several modules, including stories, videos, presentations, etc. to cover the various aspects of being an LGBTQIA Adventist.
But, Not Without Your Help
So, we’re calling on you to step up, dig deep, and pitch in whatever you can to help us share our journeys and reach out to those who need to be educated on what it truly means to be LGBTIQ and Adventist, and those who need to know they are not alone.
Can we count on you? Please consider supporting our continued efforts on April 19 by making a donation at sdakinship.org/give
First Visit with Colin
BY JERRY MCKAY
Once I named my experience—acknowledged my homosexual orientation—a predictable side effect emerged. I found myself wanting to meet others with a similar experience. The only way I knew of doing that was through an ad on the back page of The Japan Times.
Among the ads for apartments, language teachers, and cheap flights to the U.S., was the bi-weekly one-sentence notice for a gathering of gay men. The ad I had purposely ignored over the years was now my portal to meeting people like myself. I called from the language school, but only when it was deserted. The conversation was short. All I needed was the time and location of the gathering.
Kinship Kampmeeting 2018 is July 11-14 and our Women & Children First Retreat is July 6-11 in Baltimore, Maryland, United States!
Kampmeeting takes place at the Homewood Suites at BWI and our Women & Children First Retreat takes place July 6-11 at a place near downtown Baltimore, Maryland, United States.
|
